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Copyright © 2014 by Open Horizons and John Kremer

 

The Quotable Books Series ...


The War Between Men and Women:
On Men, Women, Sex, Love, Relationships, Dating, Marriage, Divorce, and Much, Much More


Click on either of the book covers on this page to order and download the book as a Word document for only $7.00.


(sample quotations from the book)

My toughest fight was with my first wife. — Muhammad Ali, boxer

Lying's the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off, but it's better if you do. — Alice, character in Closer movie

Love is the answer, but while you are waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty good questions. — Woody Allen, actor, producer, and director

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. However little known the feelings or views of such a man on his first entering a neighborhood, this truth is so well fixed in the minds of the surrounding families, that he is considered as the rightful property of some one or other of their daughters. — Jane Austen, novelist, Price and Prejudice

Until you make room in your life for someone as important to you as yourself, you will always be searching and lost. — Richard Bach, author, The Bridge Across Forever

Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world. — Lucille Ball, comedienne and actress

It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time. — Tallulah Bankhead, actress

Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred miles. — Roseanne Barr, comedienne and actress

It is a well-documented fact that guys will not ask for directions. This is a biological thing. This is why it takes several million sperm cells to locate a female egg, despite the fact that the egg is, relative to them, the size of Wisconsin. — Dave Barry, humorist

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. — Erma Bombeck, columnist

The big mistake that men make is that when they turn thirteen or fourteen, and all of a sudden they've reached puberty, they believe that they like women. Actually, you're just horny. It doesn't mean that you like women any more at twenty-one than you did at ten. — Jules Feiffer, cartoonist

You might be a redneck if your wife’s hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan. — Jeff Foxworthy, comedian

Getting divorced just because you don't love a man is almost as silly as getting married just because you do. — Zsa Zsa Gabor, actress

I know one reason kissing was created. It makes you feel warm all over, and they didn't always have electric heat or fireplaces or even stoves in their houses. — Gina, age 8

Be the center of your universe. Make all of your decisions based on how they affect you. Live every day as if you are the intergalactic emperor. But don't tell anyone. Especially your wife. — Red Green, newspaper columnist

If the Lord made anything better than a woman, he kept it for himself. — Jerry Lee Lewis, singer

When you're in love it's the most glorious two and a half days of your life. — Richard Lewis, comedian and actor


Here are the other three books in the Quotable Life Book series. Click on the titles to see sample quotations:

Children: A Quotable Guide for Parents

Life & Death: It’s Really a Simple Matter

Senior Moments: On Growing Older and Wiser


Open Horizons, P O Box 2887, Taos NM 87571; 575-751-3398

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